The Pizza Invasion of DOOM!!
by Ces
Summary: Errr...my FIRST fan-fic ever! Anywho, it's about doom and doom and doom and doom...and Zim trying to doom the skool - can Dib stop him?


Ok, I know I've done a bazillion rpg's, but this here is my first Invader Zim fanfic! Yay! So…. here it goes, e-mail invaderkirby@aol.com if you want to rate it! And no, Dib and Zim are not gay (that's just so wrong, in so many ways) and Zim and Gaz don't like each other! Sorry to bust you sick people's bubble! It's kinda long because I was really bored, but it's not half bad! Oh, and another note on the Zim/Dib thingy of doom…it even made Jhonen sick – so respect him by stopping the madness!!!! THE MADNES!!!! *smiles * weee….spell check loves me! (n/m me, I'm hyper ;p) Hehe this is ten pages long on the computer so go grab some munchies and a Pepsi Earth- child!!! Make sure you've got a lot of time to enjoy!!!  
  
Disclaimer: yea, we all know I wasn't the genius who created Invader Zim – that's Jhonen's claim (we love you Jhonen!!!). And we all know that ALL the character's weren't mine….so don't sue me DIRT-CHILD!!! Errr….*shifty eyes* yea, enjoy? Like I said, FIRST ever fan-fic….hope you liked it – it took me two whole days. A memorial of my err… doomed life as Zim would say. We can all learn something from Invader Zim *nods* Please don't take credit for my ideas, and don't mind the typo's and STUFF. Yes I know this was more of a warning than a disclaimer but like I care? Errr…don't mind the length either, like I said, I have no life (and damn proud of it!) ^_^  
  
Pizza Invasion  
  
Chapter one: return of the pizza hog  
  
****On a Sunday evening, Dib was working hard in his lab, constructing some sort of machine that resembled a robot (sorta like the ones from Dexter's Laboratory). He opened his helmet on after soldiering pieces together, and wiped sweat from his forehead. He set down the blow torch and ran upstairs.****  
  
"Gaz! I'm going to Bloaty's!" he said as he walked past her. Gaz's eye's lit up with joy.  
  
"Did you say Bloaty's? Like Bloaty's Pizza?" Dib nodded and she threw her Game Slave 2 aside.  
  
"Of coarse I'm coming!"  
  
"Fine, we're getting two pizza's, but leaving now so hurry up!"  
  
Gaz got her coat and followed her annoying brother out the door. He eyes began to spin with the pizza hog dude in the pupil. Dib gave her a weird look, but didn't say anything, and they went outside.  
  
"Why are we getting two pizza's?" asked Gaz as she skipped over a puddle.  
  
"Because," replied Dib "One's for us, and the other is for Zim." Gaz looked at him like he was crazy.  
  
"You're feeding your enemy's?"  
  
Dib shook his head  
  
"Naw, Zim doesn't like Earth food. It's a way to get in, see I built a pizza deliveryman so that way I have a way inside! *Starting to get excited* then I can install my hidden camera in Zim's lab while his err…partner…thing is eating pizza! This is so perfect!"  
  
Gaz rolls her eyes "Whatever, I just want pizza"  
  
"Fine, but no anchovies!"  
  
****Meanwhile, Zim was also working hard in his lab. He was typing away on his computer.***  
  
"Hmm….Gir seems to be quite." He thought out loud. "I had better check on him!" he punched a few keys and the computer turned off. In seconds, he was teleported from the trashcan, and into the living room. He saw Gir singing the "mysteries mystery's" theme song. Gir saw Zim, then looked back at the TV.  
  
"We're on TV!" said Gir excitedly as an "alien" came up. It was obvious it was someone in stage make-up, you could even see the wire that held him up. Zim crocked his eyebrow.  
  
"No Gir, that's not us. We have much better disguises *looks proud of himself*, and will never be caught! NEVER!" He sat down next to Gir and changed the channel, shuddering as they were showing an alien being dissected.  
  
"Lets…watch something else."  
  
Instantly the scary monkey show came on.  
  
"YAY! I love this show!" Gir hummed the doom song and looked excited. Just then the door-bell rang. Before Zim could do anything, Gir flew off the couch.  
  
"Suite up time!" He said dramatically for no reason, Gir jumped into his suite and answered the door. It was Dib's mechanical pizza deliver guy. Gir screamed with delight, while Dib hid in the bushes, keeping an eye out for the nome's, eating a slice of pizza. Zim got off the couch and eyed the pizza guy suspiciously.  
  
Chapter two: Agent 00 Dib  
  
"Gir did you order pizza?" Gir shook his head no and took the pizza, running towards the kitchen. Zim sighed and glared at the pizza man.  
  
"NOW GET OUT OF MY HOME!" He screamed as he threw money at the pizza guy. The door soon slammed, but Dib made the hand stop the door from closing all the way, without Zim's noticing because he was too busy trying to calm Gir down. Dib snickered to himself as he picked up the money, and put it in his trench-coat pocket. He put on his suction cuffs and crawled inside, climbing towards the ceiling patiently waiting for Zim to go to his lab.  
  
"NO GIR GET AWAY FROM ME!" Dib looked down to see Gir trying to hug Zim with his greasy hands. Dib tried to hide the laughter.  
  
"You wait here Gir, I'm going back to work. AND DON"T LET ANYONE ELSE IN!"  
  
Gir saluted Zim and went back to the couch as Zim took the toilet route to his lab. Dib crawled into the kitchen, without Gir's notice (since he had pepperoni's over his eyes ^_^), and quickly followed Zim after a minute of waiting. Dib landed with a hard thud on the metal floor of Zim's lab.  
  
"YES! I'm in!" Thought Dib as he crawled on the floor army-style. Through the railing, he could see Zim typing away. Curious, Dib leaned against the railing to see what Zim was typing. Dib squinted, but couldn't tell. He sighed and crawled towards Zim's ceiling. Hanging high directly above Zim, Dib bit his lower lip as he pulled out the camera, and some tool's to install it. He had to do it quietly or all hope would be lost. He took out a screwdriver and screwed the camera in place.  
  
"Almost done" he thought as he constantly looked down at Zim, who was completely oblivious to Dib.  
  
"Finally" Dib thought as he had finished. The camera blended in perfectly, only with a small blinking red light. Dib put away his tools, and then Dib took out some Gaff tape (like duct tape, only all black and much stronger, plus it's fun to throw around, but that's another story) and covered the red blinking light. He put away the tape and crawled down towards the other part of the lab, deciding to have a look around, maybe even taking some of Zim's stuff for evidence. Making it towards the other side of the lab, Dib gazed in awe.  
  
"Pretty good for a moron like Zim," thought Dib out loud as he went to the elevator and went up. When he finally came up, he found himself in the section that Gaz was in during "Bloaty's Pizza Hog". Dib ran to the window and saw Earth. His jaw dropped down as he pulled out his camera and snapped a picture or two.  
  
"Wow, I can't believe this." He said out loud as he looked once more at Earth. Dib wondered around Zim's lab some more. He saw a verity of small Earth animals in cages like chickens, squirrels, rabbits, and various snakes and rodents. Dib shuddered to think of what Zim would do to them.  
  
  
  
Chapter Three: Dancing Zim  
  
Just then, the sound of the elevator could be heard along with Gir singing the doom song very loudly and annoyingly.  
  
"Dance Zim!"  
  
"No Gir, I will not dance."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Pwease?!?"  
  
"NO!"  
  
"AWWW…I wanted to dance!"  
  
Dib could see Zim come out with Gir dancing around Zim. Dib panicked and hid in a cabinet under the cages, the door was open ajar. Through the crack of the door, Dib could see Zim and Gir.  
  
"SILINCE GIR! I need to concentrate for my beautiful plan for the skool children tomorrow."  
  
"Doom, doom, doom, doom, doomy doom doom…."  
  
"Yes Gir, doom, DOOM! For when I go to skool tomorrow, no one will be coming out, especially that Earth boy Dib."  
  
"OOOOO…doom, doom, doom, doom…"  
  
Dib gulped and listened more as Zim walked up to the counter above the cabinet. He was mixing chemicals together, but Dib couldn't tell what.  
  
"At three o'clock Gir, when the bell rings the skool will go BOOM! And be no more. MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
"YAY!" Said Gir. He threw up his hands making an explosion noise. "I want to explode too!"  
  
  
  
Chapter Four: The Elevator of Doom  
  
"No Gir, your going to get me out of the skool before three. You, and the robo-parents. At 2:30, I will be excused from skool, due too errr….stuff! Then at 3:00 exactly, everyone will be destroyed, and I shall have my revenge at Dib! Tomorrow the skool, then the world! MWAHAHHAHA!"  
  
Gir started dancing again and Dib looked at them in horror.  
  
"I have to stop them!" thought Dib, "but how?"  
  
Dib stayed there for 15 more minutes before he drifted off to sleep. When he woke again, he saw Zim and Gir had left. He checked his watch and it was 7:30 PM, he had been sleeping for two hours. Dib stretched his arms and opened the door. He glanced around to make sure Zim had gone, and seeing the close was clear he made way back towards Earth by the elevator. He went towards the elevator, but when he told the computer to go down, accesses had been denied. Dib froze in fear of being caught and backed up against the wall of the elevator. The doors shut tight and Dib was a prisoner. He wondered why it had worked before, and not now. Did Zim find out? In minutes he fell to the ground from shock as the elevator descending towards Zim's base. Dib's mind went blank, as soon as Zim opened the door, he would find him there. It was too late to do anything now. He scampered up and waited helplessly to be caught. When the door opened Zim gave him a what- are-you-doing look and quickly entered before Dib could leave. The doors closed behind him.  
  
"Stupid stink human, what are you doing here?"  
  
"Uhh…. Inspecting?"  
  
"FOOL! Did you think I'd fall for that one again? No one fool's the great Zim!"  
  
Dib laughed out loud.  
  
"What's so funny? I see nothing funny about this, you've been in my lab and my security didn't go off!?! How is that possible? Tell me…TELL ME!"  
  
Dib folded his arms and remained silent. The elevator made it to the top.  
  
"Fine then, perhaps I'll find a way to make you tell me!" He gave out a cold laugh and then clapped his hands. Immediately, a mechanical claw came and grabbed Dib. Dib struggled to get loose, but it was no use.  
  
"You'll never get away with it ZIM!"  
  
"Oh but I will MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
"And how's that?"  
  
"I'll do….stuff"  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"  
  
"YES! MWAHAHAHA! Foolish Earth boy, did you think you can stop the great Zim?"  
  
"You flatter yourself Zim, I already stopped you!"  
  
"Liar! *crocks his eye-brow* how?"  
  
"Not telling you anything! And leave the skool alone!"  
  
"Well I don't know how you found out about that…but you wont' be able to do anything about it!"  
  
Zim walked back into the lair, and the claw with Dib still in it, followed every move Zim made.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter Five: Game Slave 3  
  
Dib struggled again, but the claw was too strong. Zim made way to one of the cages, and opened it up. The claw threw Dib hard into the cage, and then Zim slammed the door shut and locked it with an Irken lock (Dib could read the "made on Irk label"). The cage was big enough for Dib to stand in. He scampered up and glared at Zim through the bars.  
  
"I'll decide what to do with you later. In the mean time enjoy my hospitality. Mwaahahahahaha! I must be off and finish my plans, GIR!"  
  
Gir ran up to him and saluted Zim, looking at Dib.  
  
"Yes master?"  
  
"GIR! Come with me, you're a part of this plan too."  
  
"YES MASTER!" Gir jumped up and hugged Zim.  
  
"Gir get off me!" Gir jumped back down and stared at Dib. He smiled and opened up his head to pull out a piggy, screaming with delight.  
  
"I love you piggy!"  
  
Zim rolled his eyes and looked back at Dib.  
  
"Ah yes, I almost forgot something." He clapped his hands and the claw was back. It went through the bars and ripped off Dib's backpack, and handed it to Zim and disappeared into the walls again.  
  
"Hey!" cried Dib  
  
"You didn't think I was that stupid, did you?"  
  
"Yes" said Dib and folded his arms again, still glaring at Zim. Zim shook his head and went downstairs, Gir closely followed. As soon as Zim and Gir were out of sight, Dib looked at his watch, Gaz was trying to contact him. She had a very annoyed look on her face.  
  
"Dib, where are you?"  
  
"You, acutely worry about me? That's a first!"  
  
"Yea, whatever. Dad's home and he want's to know where you are."  
  
"Tell him I'm in an alien cage and the alien, ZIM, wants to blow up the skool tomorrow!"  
  
Gaz sighed in disbelief "I'll tell him you're at a friends house, which is hard to believe since you don't have any!"  
  
Dib glared at her. "Don't say that Gaz! Tell him the truth, I need help with this one!"  
  
"I thought you had a perfect plan." Snickered Gaz.  
  
"I did, but then Zim found me."  
  
"Whatever, just be home in time for dinner, that's what dad said. He's going out tonight."  
  
"No, Gaz, don't leave me! I need your help!"  
  
Gaz sighed again. "I can't Dib, I'm going to get the Game Slave 3, it comes out tonight and I'm not letting you ruin this one for me like the last time because of your stupid alien friend! NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
  
"Zim's not my friend!"  
  
"Like I care?"  
  
She turned off the transmission and Dib was alone again, with no help. He realized he had no choice but to wait for Zim to come back. He felt like the small animals in the cages next to him. It wasn't long before Dib drifted off to sleep. He awoke with the sound of Gir screaming a high pitch scream about tacos. Zim was smiling, pleased at himself that Dib was in a cage.  
  
"I know exactly what to do with you!"  
  
Dib narrowed his eyes at him. "Oh yea, what's that?"  
  
"Absolutely nothing! Come Monday, you will have the pleasure of watching all the skool stink-beast's die, and you can't do anything about it! MWAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
"You think I care about them?"  
  
"Hmmm…perhaps not, but what about your sister?"  
  
"Like I care about her?"  
  
Zim gave an annoyed look. "Fine then! I will let you go to skool Monday, but I won't let you come out! In the meantime, I have found out how you got in." Zim looked pleased with himself again.  
  
"How's that?"  
  
"Simple, I got suspicious when Gir said he didn't order the pizza. Usually he knows these sorta… *waves hands around*… things. Anyhow, I saw the pathetic robot still at the door and knew it was you. I heightened security, and sure enough, my camera's found you in the elevator. Stupid foolish Earth stink monkey! Now, I have decided to let you go, since you'll be dead tomorrow anyway. You'll be forced to go to the skool, and if your ignorant sister didn't believe you, then no one will!"  
  
"How'd you know about that?!"  
  
"Easy, my computer picked up your weak technology and I listened in. Now leave, your becoming a pest."  
  
He opened up the cage and clapped his hands. The claw came and grabbed Dib. Zim led them towards his door, and the claw threw Dib outside and then the nomes dragged him out, then they threw his back pack and it hit him in the face. Zim glared at Dib once more and slammed the door behind him. Gir waved good-bye to him and bumped his head at the door. He kept running into the door untill Zim finally opened it again. Dib brushed the dirt off his trench coat, narrowed his eyes at Zim's house, and walked home.  
  
  
  
Chapter Six: "The Bell of Doom"  
  
***On Monday morning, Ms. Bitter's droned on and on about how doomed they were, just like the dinosaurs were. Dib rushed into class late again.***  
  
"Your late again, Dib."  
  
"You all must leave now! Zim's going to blow us up at three o'clock!"  
  
The kids laughed at him and Dib glared at Zim. Ms. Bitter's crocked her eyebrow.  
  
"Do you have proof of this?" she asked as Zim snickered, but Dib dug in his backpack and pulled out a black tape.  
  
"Yes! I do!"  
  
Zim's jaw dropped.  
  
"How did you -? I mean *twiddles his thumbs innocently *"  
  
"Well ZIM, it was easy. Before you caught me, I installed a camera in your lab. This morning, while you were already at skool, I went back in and got it. That's why I was late Ms. Bitter's."  
  
"Whatever, child, just put in the tape."  
  
Dib nodded and put the black tape in the VSR. He smiled as it showed Zim talking to Gir about all of his plans to blow up the skool. The classmates and Ms. Bitter's gasped, and Zim had a look of horror since his disguise was off, and so was Gir's. Zim raised his hand.  
  
"I can explain this Ms. Bitters, it's not like the Eart- I mean what Dib says."  
  
"Then what is it?" She asked after she slithered over.  
  
"I was practicing for a play. That robot looking thing is a prop, and I was in costume."  
  
Dib sneered at Zim. "Then what was the play called?"  
  
Zim thought for a moment then proudly answered "The Bell of Doom!"  
  
The kids gasped for a moment, but then the bell rang for lunch. The students forgot about the tape and Dib's claim and went to lunch, chatting. Zim and Dib had to stay behind and see the principal with Ms. Bitters. The principal was big, fat, and mean looking. He glared at Dib, since Dib had always gotten in trouble for trying to expose Zim.  
  
"Not you again." He said sneering at Dib.  
  
"'Fraid so." Replied Ms. Bitters. "However, you might want to see this."  
  
Dib nodded and showed the tape to the principal. When it was over, Zim told the principal he was practicing for a play, while Dib told the principal Zim was an alien trying to blow up the skool. They called someone from the FBI to investigate the situation, and they said it was the play. Dib protested saying there was no play called "The Bell of Doom" and the FBI didn't seem to care, taking Zim's side of the story. Being late for class, the three returned to another boring skool day. During art class, Dib raised his hand.  
  
"Ms. Bitter's, can I go to the bathroom?"  
  
With a heavy sigh she nodded and Dib jumped down and walked towards her desk. She placed the hall pass that Zim had on during "Dark Harvest", and placed it around his neck.  
  
"If you leave skool…it explodes."  
  
Dib nodded and Zim smiled at the thought of Dib exploding. It was already 1:30 and Dib had to find a way to stop the bomb. He went into the bathroom and pulled out his computer.  
  
"Computer, analyze the skool."  
  
There were a few blinking lights, and then a hologram of the skool popped up. It was a 3-D diagram of the skool's halls and walls. Dib looked and saw where Zim had hid the bomb, it was in the PA system in the principal's office. Zim had it so as soon as the bell went off at three, so would the bomb. Dib sighed realizing he would need a diversion, so he could get everyone out of the principal's office and disarm the bomb. But how was he going to do that?  
  
Chapter Seven: Fire Alarm  
  
***Meanwhile, Zim glared at Dib's empty seat and wondered what he could be doing. He had finished his drawing of Dib exploding from the hall pass. He glanced at the clock and it read 1:45. Zim raised his hand***  
  
"Yes Zim, what is it?"  
  
"Dib has been gone a long time."  
  
Ms. Bitter's looked at Dib's empty chair and nodded.  
  
"You're right, he has. Why don't you look for him, making sure he didn't leave. But you can't leave without a pass."  
  
"Of course."  
  
Zim walked to the front and she gave him a roll of tape that said "hall pass" on it. Zim walked out of the room and looked for Dib. No sooner than he had, the fire alarm went off and smoke started to rise from the principal's office. Zim glared knowing Dib was behind it. While the other children screamed and ran outside like a stampede, Zim made his way towards the principal's office and found Dib, tampering with his bomb.  
  
"What do you think you are doing?"  
  
Dib jumped with surprise. Then narrowed his eyes at Zim.  
  
"Stopping you."  
  
"I don't think you know how to stop an Irken bomb."  
  
"I bet you know how."  
  
"Of coarse I do. All you do is cut the red and purple wire, since that's our color's." Zim slapped his head, not believing he had said that out loud. Dib smiled.  
  
"Thanks for the information, ZIM!"  
  
Dib cut the red and purple wires with scissors, and smiled when the red timer was shut off with the rest of the bomb. Dib threw it outside and it hit a random kid.  
  
"Well, thanks to your stunt this morning, I know about your camera!"  
  
"Yea, but you don't know where it is."  
  
"Yes I do, it's right above my computer. I'll have Gir destroy it when I get home."  
  
"You mean IF you get home!"  
  
Dib pointed to the fire, which blocked the door to get out. Dib started coughing, but the smoke didn't seem to effect Zim. Dib made a mental note of this. Zim laughed sarcastically.  
  
"Oh that was smart of you DIB, trap us both in here!"  
  
"Hey you were the one who came in here!"  
  
Zim glared at Dib but didn't say anything. He was too worried in getting out alive. He saw an open window and jumped on the principal's desk. Dib watched as Zim did a few flips over the fire and went to the window. Zim smiled at the worried looking Dib.  
  
"Looks like you'll be the only one not coming out of this skool DIB! My plan worked after all! MWAHAHHAHA!"  
  
Zim leaped out of the window and then shut it tightly behind him. The window automatically locked Dib in. Dib cursed Zim under his breath. Zim ran to the designated spot assigned by Ms. Bitter's.  
  
"Where's Dib? If we don't find him, we'll get sued by his horrible family!"  
  
Zim sighed and told her he was in the principal's office. Zim said how he bravely tried to rescue him, but the fire blocked the door. Ms. Bitter's sighed and mumbled something about paperwork and lawsuits, and how she used to be a forewoman but something went horribly wrong. She told the firemen when they arrived, that Dib was in the principal's office and the fireman rushed to the principal's and found that Dib had passed out from the inhaling too much of the smoke, and the fire was about to burn him. The fireman bravely rescued Dib and put him over his shoulders, carrying him out to safety. Dib awoke and glared at Zim. Ms. Bitter's looked at him.  
  
"Your lucky your friend over there, Zim, tried to save you or we wouldn't know where you were."  
  
Dib had a look of disgust.  
  
"Save me?!? He tried to KILL me!"  
  
"I think the fumes got to his head" whispered the firemen to Ms. Bitter's who nodded and dismissed the children, due to damage of the skool. Zim was declared a hero for "saving" Dib, and was interviewed by local news reporter's, who ignored Dib's testimonial's that Zim was an alien who tried to kill them all.  
  
Gir came and picked up Zim.  
  
"I like how our plan went Gir."  
  
Gir smiled and hugged his piggy, waving to the pizza guy, while Zim was trying to avoid the smell of the free pizza they got for being a "hero".  
  
The End? 


End file.
